Gun Wounds Again?

In Hong Kong, the Hollywood of martial arts movies, they translate their films with English subtitles to reach a broader audience—and they don’t always get it right. This is a sampling of actual subtitles compiled by Stefan Hammond & Mike Wilkins in their book “Sex & Zen & A Bullet in the Head.”

I am damn unsatisfied to be killed in this way.

Same old rules: no eyes, no groin.

A normal person wouldn’t steal pituitaries.

Damn, I’ll burn you into a BBQ chicken!

Take my advice or I’ll spank you without pants.

Who gave you the nerve to get killed here?

Quiet or I’ll blow your throat up.

Beware! Your bones are going to be disconnected.

The bullets inside are very hot. Why do I feel so cold?

You always use violence. I should’ve ordered glutinous rice chicken.

You daring lousy guy.

Beat him out of recognizable shape!

Fatty, you with your thick face have hurt my instep.