Actual Newspaper Headlines

Writing headlines is no easy thing. Particularly for journalists who have little time to think about how a line might be misread. Of course, they have editors and proof readers to catch this stuff, but they’re moving fast, too. So, for anybody reading carefully these kind of gems are occasionally published. Some may take a moment to realize what the reporter actually meant. Some may take a moment to realize how it could be misinterpreted. (Never underestimate the power of a well-placed comma.) And others are just… wrong

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half

New Vaccine May Contain Rabies

Arson Suspect is Held in Massachusetts Fire

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group

Man Struck by Lightening Faces Battery Charge

Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing

British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case

Farmer Bill Dies in House

Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms

Teacher Strikes Idle Kids

Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim

Miners Refuse to Work After Death

Deer Kill 17,000

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

Reagan Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead

Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax

And then there’s the utterly stupid…

If Strike isn’t Settled Quickly, it May Last a While

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says

War Dims Hope for Peace

Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide

Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told